This has nothing to do with your radio station, but we get these on a regular basis, and just thought you might enjoy them. Some are serious, but most are light, because after all, laughter and smiling is great for the soul! Please feel free to pass them on - and we will do our best not to offend anyone with off-color, political [Wow, do we get some great ones on this topic!] or sexual remarks....We will add to them....

This is so important, we are going to put it at the head of our list, and leave it here. Thanks to our good friend - and Coast-FM supporter - Bill Dolan from Waverly for sending this on. Please forward onto as many as you can.

Blood  Clots/Stroke - They Now Have a Fourth Indicator,  the Tongue.

During a BBQ, a woman stumbled and took a little fall - she assured  everyone that she was fine (they offered to call  paramedics). She said she had just tripped over  a brick because of her new shoes. They got her cleaned up and brought her a new plate of  food. While she appeared a bit shaken up, Jane went about enjoying herself the rest of the  evening.  But later, Jane's husband called telling everyone that his wife had been taken to  the hospital. An hour later, Jane passed away. She had suffered a stroke at the BBQ. Had her friends known how to identify the  signs of a stroke, perhaps Jane would be with us today. Some don't die. They end up in a  helpless, hopeless condition instead.

It  only takes a minute to read this....

A  neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke  victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the  effects of a stroke...totally. He said  the trick was getting a stroke recognized,  diagnosed, and then getting the patient  medically cared for within 3 hours, which is  tough.Thank  God for the sense to remember the '3' steps, STR. Read and Learn!

Sometimes symptoms of a  stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately,  the lack of awareness spells disaster. The  stroke victim may suffer severe brain damage  when people nearby fail to recognize the  symptoms of a stroke. Now doctors say a  bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions:

S  *Ask  the individual to SMILE.

T  *Ask  the person to TALK and SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE  (Coherently - e.g  'Is it sunny out  today?')

R  *Ask  him or her to RAISE BOTH  ARMS.

If  he or she has trouble with ANY ONE of these  tasks, call 911 immediately  and describe the symptoms to the  dispatcher.

NOTE:  Another 'sign' of a stroke is this: Ask the  person to 'stick' out his tongue. If the tongue  is 'crooked,'  if it goes to one side or the  other,  that is  also an indication of a  stroke.

A  cardiologist says if everyone who gets this  e-mail sends it to 10 people; you can bet that  at least one life will be saved. 
  
 Videos:

Going fishing with a whiney girlfriend? Here's the fix...

Pretty cool, an old promotional newsreel from 1935,,,,

Watch the speedbumps in Germany - they could throw you for a loop....

Evian babies roller-blading - this is waaaaay cool....

Where NOT to install a cat door!

Ever driven in New York City? Now, here's one more reason why not to....

This is almost unbelievable. This young girl  is now 12 and she started painting at age 4.  Her Mother was an atheist so God was never discussed in their home and she really had never been taught anything about Him or the bible. She has visions and has told her Mom she has visited heaven numerous times. She gives God the glory for her talent. She has never had an art lesson. P.S. Her family now believes in God! Enjoy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmm-0-Rdxo8&feature=related 

Charlie Callas was truly one of the funniest comedians to grace 'The Tonight Show.'

And who can forget Foster Brooks?

A DC-10 lands on L.A's 101 Freeway. Some people just have too much creative time on their hands, but this short video is outstanding!

This is a sister act from the early 40s....[watch it to the end] - these girls were amazing!

Did you know a crow was this smart? This will take you to You-Tube....

Did you know a dog could be this smart? Gin the dancing Border Collie....

Remember Susan Boyle's introduction to the world? If this doesn't make your heart sing, nothing will....

Afraid to fly? This is positively terrifying....

Flying out of Halifax on United? Dave Carroll did, but he was the wrong guy to mess with!

We can't resist this - no offense meant to anyone.....

Or this....

Slide Shows:

Want to see what a million dollar Ferrari looks like after it hits a power pole at 200mph [320kph]?

This is the most amazing collection of automobile dioramas this writer has ever seen. The cars are models!

Every year on Sainte Luce Beach, Quebec, there is a sand building contest. You have never seen anything like these magnificent sculptures. Sadly, they are only there until the wind and rain remove them. This is well worth the ten minutes or so it take for you to view.....

Edgar Mueller does street art. This is amazing.....

Commercials:

More and more, we are subjected to television [and radio, God forbid!] commercials that are just down-right stupid and boring. We feel these challenge mediocrity in a big way.....

2009 Super Bowl spots....     and this Budweiser one [tad risque!]. 

Back in the late 50s, Bob and Ray did these for Piel's Beer.

In a somewhat perverted way, these Ally Bank spots are hilarious:
One, two, three

Ford police chase - this is great!

Beauty is nothing without brains....

Can a butterfly cause a disaster?

A tad risque? You decide....They do it a little differently in Australia.

Selling a Nissan in Canada? Here's how.....

Buying a beer in the boonies? It's not as pretty out there as it first meets the eye!

British Fiat commercial....Don't touch this bloke's Fiat!  The French do it differently....And watch going jogging in France....

And other things...

New!!! 

JOE LEGAL vs. JOSE ILLEGAL

You have two families: "Joe Legal" and "Jose Illegal." Both families have two parents, two children, and live in Tuscon, Arizona.

Joe Legal works in construction, has a Social Security Number and makes $25.00 per hour with taxes deducted. Jose Illegal also works in construction, has NO Social Security Number, and gets paid $15.00 cash "under the table."

Ready? Now pay attention... Joe Legal: $25.00 per hour x 40 hours = $1000.00 per week, or $52,000.00 per year. Now take 30% away for state and federal tax; Joe Legal now has $31,231.00. Jose Illegal: $15.00 per hour x 40 hours = $600.00 per week, or $31,200.0 0 per year. Jose Illegal pays no taxes. Jose Illegal now has $31,200.00.

Joe Legal pays medical and dental insurance with limited coverage for his family at $600.00 per month, or $7,200.00 per year. Joe Legal now has $24,031.00. Jose Illegal has full medical and dental coverage through the state and local clinics at a cost of $0.00 per year. Jose Illegal still has $31,200.00.

Joe Legal makes too much money and is not eligible for food stamps or welfare. Joe Legal pays $500.00 per month for food, or $6,000.00 per year.. Joe Legal now has $18,031.00. Jose Illegal has no documented income and is eligible for food stamps and welfare. Jose Illegal still has $31,200.00.

Joe Legal pays rent of $1,200.00 per month, or $14,400.00 per year. Joe Legal now has $9,631 .00.  Jose Illegal receives a $500.00 per month federal rent subsidy. Jose Illegal pays out that $500.00 per month, or $6,000.00 per year. Jose Illegal still has $31,200.00.

Joe Legal pays $200.00 per month, or $2,400.00 for insurance. Joe Legal now has $7,231.00.

Jose Illegal says, "We don't need no stinkin' insurance!" and still has $31,200.00.

Joe Legal has to make his $7,231.00 stretch to pay utilities, gasoline, etc.

Jose Illegal has to make his $31,200.00 stretch to pay utilities, gasoline, and what he sends out of the country every month.

Joe Legal now works overtime on Saturdays or gets a part time job after work to make ends meet.

Jose Illegal has nights and weekends off to enjoy with his family.

Joe Legal's and Jose Illegal's children both attend the same school. Joe Legal pays for his children's lunches while Jose Illegal's children get a government sponsored lunch. Jose Illegal's children have an after school ESL program. Joe Legal's children go home.

Joe Legal and Jose Illegal both enjoy the same police and fire services, but Joe paid for them and Jose did not pay.

Do you get it, now?

Obviously, nothing!

Why some athletes can't have regular jobs:

1. Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me.  I wan' all the kids to copulate me."
 
2. New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."
 
3. And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the 'Skin's say: "I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too."
 
4. Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach John Jenkins: "He treats us like men.  He lets us wear earrings.."
 
5. Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann: "Nobody in football should be called a genius.  A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
 
6. Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh: "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes."
 
7. Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: "You guys line up alphabetically by height.." And, "You guys pair up in groups of three, and then line up in a circle."
 
8. Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson going to prison: "Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton."
 
9. Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker: "That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes."
 
10. Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning, regardless of what time it is."
 
11. Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: "My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt." 
 
12. Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player: "I told him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'"
 
13. Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four Fs and one D: "Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject."
 
14. In the words of NC State great Charles Shackelford, "I can go to my left or right, I am amphibious."

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
 
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________________________________

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He's 20, much like your IQ.

His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog. There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death.

      'Well,' replied the farmer, "there's my farm hand who's been with me for three years. I pay him $500 a week plus free room and board. He also gets triple time for working on a Sunday and a pitcher of beer for a Happy Hour every Friday.

     'The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her $400 per week plus free room and board. She doesn't work on Sundays and I provide paid satellite television for free in her room.

     'Then there's the half-wit - he works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about $20 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of whiskey every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.'

    'That's the guy I want to talk to...the half-wit,' says the agent.
 
    'Then that would be me,' replied the farmer.

                                                              * * * * * *

Two Middle East mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a plate of tabouli and a pint of goat's milk.  The older of the two pulls a bag out of her purse and starts flipping through photos.  They start reminiscing. 'This is my oldest son, Mujibar.  He would have been 24 years old now.'

     'Yes, I remember him as a baby,' says the other mother cheerfully.

      'He's a martyr now though,' the mother  confides.

      'Oh, so sad dear,' says the other.

      'And this is my second son, Khalid.  He would have been 21.'

      'Oh, I remember him,' says the other happily,  'he had such curly hair when he was born.'

      'He's a martyr too,' says the mother quietly.

      'Oh, gracious me . . . , ' says the other.

      'And this is my third son.  My baby.  My beautiful Ahmed.  He would have been 18,' she whispers.

      'Yes,' says the friend enthusiastically, 'I remember when he first started school.'

      'He's a martyr also,' says the mother,  with tears in her eyes.

After a pause and a deep sigh, the second mother looks wistfully at the photographs and, searching for  the right words, says . . .

      'They blow up so fast these days, don't they?'

                                                                                * * * * * *

A Japanese company [Toyota] and an American company [GM] decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the big race. On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile.

The Americans, very discouraged and depressed, decided to investigate the reason for the crushing defeat. A management team made up of senior officials was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action. Their conclusion was that the Japanese had eight rowing, and one steering, while the American team had seven steering and two rowing. Feeling a deeper study was in order, GM Management hired a consulting company and paid them three million dollars for a second opinion. The consulting firm advised, of course, that too many were steering while not enough were rowing.

Not sure how to utilize this information -  but not wanting to take another defeat -  the GM rowing team's management structure was totally reorganized to include four steering supervisors, two area steering superintendents, and one assistant superintendent steering manager. They also implemented a new performance system that would give the two rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. This was called 'Rowing Team Quality First,' with meetings, dinners and free pens for the rowers. There was also discussion on getting new paddles, canoes and other equipment, like Walkmans to improve morale. Extra vacation days and large bonuses were also tossed into the mix if the team were to win. The next year the Japanese won by two miles.

Humiliated beyond belief, the American management laid off one rower, halted development of a new canoe, sold all the paddles, and canceled all capital investments for new equipment. The money saved was distributed to the senior executives on the team in the form of large bonuses.

The next year, try as he might, the lone designated rower was unable to even finish the race [having no paddles], so he was laid off for unacceptable performance, all the canoe equipment was sold, and the next year's racing team was outsourced to India.

To see what NOT taking government handouts has done for Ford, look at the 2012 Super Chief. 

A friend who's a trooper with the Texas Department of Public Safety came across a relatively new Lexus wedged up in the crotch of a tree. It seems the driver had been going a little too fast and skidded off the road and flew into the crotch of a huge oak. The car's roof was compacted down, and he knew no one had come out of it alive - smoke and steam were coming from every crevice.  However, after checking things out he saw a woman in her 60s, dazed, walking around, seeming unhurt. He called for EMS, and when they came and checked her out, they gave her a clean bill of health.

      "I don't know what happened," she said. "What could I have done differently?"

      "Differently?," the officer asked, somewhat perplexed. "I wouldn't do anything differently - but, I would certainly continue to believe in God, and I would certainly go out and buy another Lexus!"

HAVING MOM OVER FOR DINNER:

Brian invited his mother over for dinner. During the course of the meal, Brian's mother couldn't help but notice how beautiful Brian's 'roommate,' Jennifer,  was. Brian's Mom had long been suspicious of a relationship between Brian and Jennifer, and this had only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Brian and Jennifer than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, Brian volunteered, 'I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you Jennifer and I are just roommates.'

About a week later, Jennifer came to Brian saying, 'Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle we received from my mother. You don't suppose she took it, do you?'

Brian said, 'Well, I doubt it, but I'll send her an email just to be sure.' So he sat down and wrote:

'Dearest Mom - I'm not saying that you 'did' take the gravy ladle from the house, and I'm not saying that you 'did not' take the gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner. Please let me know.

Love , Brian'

This was the reply:

I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Jennifer , and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Jennifer.  But the fact remains that if Jennifer is sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now.

Love, Mom - PS - Never lie to your Mom.

                                                    * * * * * *                                                            

This is a great story, and one that needs to be read and re-read...

The Pickle Jar
 
The pickle jar as far back as I can remember sat on the floor beside the dresser in my parents' bedroom.  When he got ready for bed, Dad would empty his pockets and toss his coins into the jar.  As a small boy I was always fascinated at the sounds the coins made as they were dropped into the jar.  They landed with a merry jingle when the jar was almost empty. Then the tones gradually muted to a dull thud as the jar was filled.

I used to squat on the floor in front of the jar and admire the copper and silver circles that glinted like a pirate's treasure when the sun poured through the bedroom window.  When the jar was filled, Dad would sit at the kitchen table and roll the coins before taking them to the bank.

Taking the coins to the bank was always a big production. Stacked neatly in a small cardboard box, the coins were placed between Dad and me on the seat of his old truck. Each and every time, as we drove to the bank, Dad would look at me hopefully. 'Those coins are going to keep you out of the textile mill, son You're going to do better than me.  This old mill town's not going to hold you back.'

Also, each and every time, as he slid the box of rolled coins across the counter at the bank toward the cashier, he would grin proudly 'These are for my son's college fund. He'll never work at the mill all his life like me.'

We would always celebrate each deposit by stopping for an ice cream cone.. I always got chocolate. Dad always got vanilla. When the clerk at the ice cream parlor handed Dad his change, he would show me the few coins nestled in his palm. 'When we get home, we'll start filling the jar again.' He always let me drop the first coins into the empty jar. As they rattled around with a brief, happy jingle, we grinned at each other. 'You'll get to college on pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters,' he said. 'But you'll get there;  I'll see to that.' No matter how rough things got at home, Dad continued to doggedly drop his coins into the jar. Even the summer when Dad got laid off from the mill, and Mama had to serve dried beans several times a week, not a single dime was taken from the jar.

To the contrary, as Dad looked across the table at me, pouring catsup over my beans to make them more palatable, he became more determined than ever to make a way out for me. 'When you finish college, Son,' he told me, his eyes glistening, 'You'll never have to eat beans again - unless you want to.'

The years passed, and I finished college and took a job in an other town. Once, while visiting my parents, I used the phone in their bedroom, and noticed that the pickle jar was gone. It had served its purpose and had been removed. A lump rose in my throat as I stared at the spot beside the dresser where the jar had always stood. My dad was a man of few words, and never lectured me on the values of determination, perseverance, and faith. The pickle jar had taught me all these virtues far more eloquently than the most flowery of words could have done.  When I married, I told my wife Susan about the significant part the lowly pickle jar had played in my life as a boy.. In my mind, it defined, more than anything else, how much my dad had loved me.

The first Christmas after our daughter Jessica was born, we spent the holiday with my parents.  After dinner, Mom and Dad sat next to each other on the sofa, taking turns cuddling their first grandchild.. Jessica began to whimper softly, and Susan took her from Dad's arms. 'She probably needs to be changed,' she said, carrying the baby into my parents' bedroom to diaper her.  When Susan came back into the living room, there was a strange mist in her eyes.

She handed Jessica back to Dad before taking my hand and leading me into the room. 'Look,' she said softly, her eyes directing me to a spot on the floor beside the dresser. To my amazement, there, as if it had never been removed, stood the old pickle jar, the bottom already covered with coins. I walked over to the pickle jar, dug down into my pocket, and pulled out a fistful of coins. With a gamut of emotions choking me, I dropped the coins into the jar. I looked up and saw that Dad, carrying Jessica, had slipped quietly into the room. Our eyes locked, and I knew he was feeling the same emotions I felt. Neither one of us could speak.

This truly touched my heart. I know it has yours as well. Sometimes we are so busy adding up our troubles that we forget to count our blessings.  Never underestimate the power of your actions.  With one small gesture you can change a person's life, for better or for worse..

God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way. Look for Good in others.

To realize the value of a sister/brother ask someone who doesn't have one....

To realize the value of ten years ask a newly divorced couple.

To realize the value of four years ask a graduate.

To realize the value of one year ask a student who has failed a final exam.

To realize the value of nine months: ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.

To realize the value of one month: ask a mother who has given birth to a premature baby.

To realize the value of one week, ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize the value of one minute ask a person who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize the value of one second ask a person who has survived an accident.

Time waits for no one. Treasure every moment you have. You will treasure it even more when you can share it with someone special.. To realize the value of a friend or family member: you only have to lose one.

The origin of this letter is unknown, but it brings good luck to everyone who passes it on. Remember....Hold on tight to the ones you love! Send this letter to friends & family to whom you wish good fortune.

THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER

This one is a little different... . Two Different Versions.... ......... ....  Two Different Morals

1. OLD VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.  The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

2. 2010 MODERN VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving. All the major TV networks show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.

The world is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.' ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, “We shall overcome.” Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's  sake.  

The president condemns the ant and blames President Bush, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, the Pope and global warming for the grasshopper's plight. Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant’s food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperous and once peaceful, neighborhood.

The entire nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it.  The truly sad part of this story can be seen in what is left of Detroit*, once a proud, vibrant city, now a hell-hole on earth.
* This video has been filmed from a conservative approach, and we hope it offends no one. But it's hard to ignore the facts - Detroit is an amazing mess, the likes of which is seen in few other places on earth, Gary, Indiana being another. Detroit's median home price is $5,700.
 

Note: The following was taken from on-line Pravda, the English version of the Russian news source., and forwarded to us by an English speaking fan in Moscow, who loves our site [Thanks!]. It is important to understand that wreckless American spending in the past year has dropped the U.S. dollar by 20%, which is why the Canadian dollar has risen to almost par. This is bad for Canada, because exports now cost more, which means those buying them on the other end, will start really 'shopping' the world for better deals.  This will hurt Canadian businesses, and hence Canadian workers. This also will assault the tourism industry, because when the dollar was 65 cents, tourists came to Nova Scotia because it was a 'deal.' Now, it is no longer such a deal, even though its beauty has in no way diminished. We reiterate that what is bad for America will also be detrimental to Canada and vice-versa.  Finally, this is not written by an 'anti-American' [far from it] - this writer has spent decades in the U.S., and loves many aspects of that country. It is, like Canada, for the most part made up of kind, generous, caring people. Which are all the more reasons this piece is so terrifying:

"It must be said, that like the breaking of a great dam, the American descent into Marxism is happening with breath taking speed, against the back drop of a passive, hapless sheeple, excuse me dear reader, I meant people.

"True, the situation has been well prepared on and off for the past century, especially the past twenty years.  T The initial testing grounds was conducted upon our Holy Russia and a bloody test it was. But we Russians would not just roll over and give up our freedoms and our souls, no matter how much money Wall Street poured into the fists of the Marxists.

"Those lessons were taken and used to properly prepare the American populace for the surrender of their freedoms and souls, to the whims of their elites and betters.

"First, the population was dumbed down through a politicized and substandard education system based on pop culture, rather then the classics. Americans know more about their favorite TV dramas than the drama in DC that directly affects their lives. They care more for their 'right' to choke down a McDonalds burger or a Burger King burger than for their constitutional rights. Then they turn around and lecture us about our rights and about our  'democracy.'  Pride blind the foolish.

"Then their faith in God was destroyed, until their churches, all tens of thousands of different 'branches and denominations' were for the most part little more then Sunday circuses and their televangelists and top protestant mega preachers were more then happy to sell out their souls and flocks to be on the 'winning' side of one pseudo Marxist politician or another. Their flocks may complain, but when explained that they would be on the 'winning' side, their flocks were ever so quick to reject Christ in hopes for earthly power.  Even our Holy Orthodox churches are scandalously liberalized in America  .

"The final collapse has come with the election of Barack Obama.  His speed in the past three months has been truly impressive.  His spending and money printing has been a record setting, not just in America 's short history but in the world.  If this keeps up for more then another year - and there is no sign that it will not  -  America at best will resemble the Weimar Republic and at worst Zimbabwe.

"These past two weeks have been the most breath taking of all.  First came the announcement of a planned redesign of the American Byzantine tax system, by the very thieves who used it to bankroll their thefts, losses, and swindles of hundreds of billions of dollars.  These make our Russian oligarchs look little more then ordinary street thugs, in comparison.  Yes, the Americans have beat our own thieves in the shear volumes.  Should we congratulate them?

"These men, of course, are not an elected panel but made up of appointees picked from the very financial oligarchs and their henchmen who are now gorging themselves on trillions of American dollars, in one bailout after another.  They are also usurping the rights, duties, and powers of the American congress (parliament).  Again, congress has put up little more than a whimper to their masters.

"Then came Barack Obama's command that GM's (General Motors) president step down from leadership of his company.  That is correct, dear reader, in the land of 'pure' free markets, the American president now has the power, the self-given power, to fire CEOs and we can assume other employees of private companies, at will.  Come hither, go dither, the centurion commands his minions.

"So it should be no surprise, that the American president has followed this up with a 'bold' move of declaring that he and another group of unelected, chosen stooges will now redesign the entire automotive industry and will even be the guarantee of automobile policies.  I am sure that if given the chance, they would happily try and redesign it for the whole of the world, too. Prime Minister Putin, less then two months ago, warned Obama and UK's Blair, not to follow the path to Marxism, it only leads to disaster.  Apparently, even though we suffered 70 years of this Western sponsored horror show, we know nothing, as foolish, drunken Russians, so let our "wise" Anglo-Saxon fools find out the folly of their own pride.  Again, the American public has taken this with barely a whimper...but a 'free man' whimper.

"So, should it be any surprise to discover that the Democratically controlled Congress of America is working on passing a new regulation that would give the American Treasury department the power to set 'fair' maximum salaries, evaluate performance, and control how private companies give out pay raises and bonuses?  Senator Barney Frank, a social pervert basking in ... his Marxist enlightenment, has led this effort.. He stresses that this only affects companies that receive government monies, but it is retroactive and taken to a logical extreme, this would include any company or industry that has ever received a tax break or incentive.

"The Russian owners of American companies and industries should look thoughtfully at this and the option of closing their facilities down and fleeing the land of the Red as fast as possible... In other words, divest while there is still value left.

"The proud American will go down into his slavery without a fight, beating his chest, and proclaiming to the world, how free he really is..  The world will only snicker."

Stanislav Mishin ©... « PRAVDA.Ru ».

Feeling down? Well Then, Consider These ....

When his 38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Provo , Utah would-be robber Jason Ellison did something that can only inspire wonder: he peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
           
The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez Oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.00. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.

Still think you are having a Bad Day????

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

Are Ya OK Now? - No?

Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany. Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly. The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.

What?!? STILL having a Bad Day????

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb.
It came back with 'Return to Sender' stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits. God is Good!

There now, Feeling Better?

* * * * * *

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. The vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."

The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," replied the vet.

"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom.  He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room.

A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.. The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck." The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman, still in shock, took the bill.

"$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"

The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill
would have been $20. But with the lab report and the cat scan, it's now $150.

A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Enzo, has cheated him out of 10 million bucks. His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place - it was assumed that Enzo would hear nothing that he might have to testify about in court.
 
When the Godfather goes to confront Enzo about his missing $10 million, he takes along his lawyer who knows sign language.

The Godfather tells the lawyer, "Ask him where the 10 million bucks is that he embezzled from me."
 
The lawyer, using sign language, asks Enzo where the money is.  Enzo signs back, "I don't know what you are talking about."
 
The lawyer tells the Godfather, "He says he doesn't know what you are talking about."
 
The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to Enzo's temple and says, "Ask him again!"
 
The lawyer signs to Enzo, "He'll kill you if you don't tell him."  Enzo signs back, "OK. You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed in my cousin Bruno's backyard in Woodbridge, right underneath the laundry vent!"
 
The Godfather asks the lawyer, "What did he say?"
 
The lawyer replies, " 'Screw you, you don't have the nerve to pull the trigger.'"
 
 Don't you just LOVE lawyers?!